YOUR CHILDHOOD FIXATION AFFECTS YOUR ADULT LIFE DECISIONS

  Sigmud Freud an old psychologist discovered the stages of psychosexual developments in children and culled from this, these different stages of childhood development has a fixation which affects the transition into the next developmental stage. In other words it is believed that personality formation comes from these stages of psychosexual development.

Oral Stage :(Birth to 18 months). During the oral stage, the child is focused on oral pleasures (sucking). Too much or too little gratification can result in an Oral Fixation or Oral Personality. This type of personality may have a stronger tendency to smoke, drink alcohol, over eat, or bite his or her nails. Personality wise, these individuals may become overly dependent upon others, gullible, and perpetual followers not leaders. On the other hand, they may also fight these urges and develop pessimism and aggression toward others.

 Anal Stage :( 18 months to three years). The child’s focus of pleasure in this stage is on eliminating and retaining feces. Through society’s pressure, mainly via parents, the child has to learn to control anal stimulation. In terms of personality, after effects of an anal fixation during this stage can result in an obsession with cleanliness, perfection, and control (anal retentive). On the opposite end of the spectrum, they may become messy and disorganized (anal expulsive). 

Phallic Stage :( ages 3-6): here the pleasure zone switches to the genitals. Here there is the Oedipus complex where the boy child develops unconscious sexual desires towards the mother and sees his father as a competition and they also develop fear that they will be punished by their father for these feelings such as castrating them

Later it was added that girls go through a similar situation, developing unconscious sexual attraction to their father. Out of fear of castration and due to the strong competition of his father, boys eventually decide to identify with him rather than fight him. By identifying with his father, the boy develops masculine characteristics and identifies himself as a male, and represses his sexual feelings toward his mother. A fixation at this stage could result in sexual deviancies (both overindulging and avoidance) and weak or confused sexual identity according to psychoanalysts.

 Latency Stage (age 6- puberty). It’s during this stage that sexual urges remain repressed and children interact and play mostly with same sex peers. There is serious involvement in school activities and development of intellectual ability.

 Genital Stage (puberty on). The final stage of psychosexual development begins at the start of puberty when sexual urges are once again awakened. Through the lessons learned during the previous stages, adolescents direct their sexual urges onto opposite sex peers; with the primary focus of pleasure on the genitals.

              WHATS YOUR FIXATION?

TOO TIGHT OR TOO LOOSE?

 

Some people often complain that their vaginas are either too tight or too loose. Even some guys also complain about it. Loose vaginas can tamper with a woman's security. Both parties don't enjoy love making when the vagina is loose. This could severe a relationship because even if sex isn't supposed to be the reason for a true relationship it plays a major role.
    For vagina tightness you need to understand that the vagina muscles are elastic and return back to position after being pulled or extended,therefore through enough stimulation the vagina opening relaxes in anticipation of love making,So the vagina is supposed to experience vagina arousal loosening. If the vaginal is just too tight during love making then its either the woman hasn't had enough pleasuring to allow her vagina muscles relax to be comfortable enough for insertion or she isn't just in the mood for sex. Some women need close to 30minutes of foreplay before lovemaking.So the remedy for too tight vagina is in the hands of the partner.
   Now to the too loose vagina,hmmmm.. The KEGEL exercise is one approach to tightening the pelvic muscles. It is a very private exercise and this can be done anywhere anytime by the woman. Try holding back your urine for some few seconds while tightening the muscle wall. You could also just randomly tighten the walls,you could insert your index finger and try to feel if you could tighten around it this will enable you know if you are using the right muscles.Do this at least 6 contractions, ten times a day and in about 8 weeks you should start seeing effects and enjoying more intense orgasms also have intercourse in the man-on-top position. Once he inserts, he lifts himself up and the woman closes her legs. Her thighs squeeze his penis and make her feel tight.